All Consuming : seiran

Consuming "Rune Factory: A Fantasy Harvest Moon"

nobody@allconsuming.net (seiran) — Mon, 21 Jul 2008 15:10:22 GMT

Rune Factory: A Fantasy Harvest Moon

by Natsume

Consuming "The Angel with One Hundred Wings: A Tale from the Arabian Nights"

nobody@allconsuming.net (seiran) — Fri, 18 Jul 2008 19:32:14 GMT

The Angel with One Hundred Wings: A Tale from the Arabian Nights

by Daniel Horch

Consuming "The Light Ages"

nobody@allconsuming.net (seiran) — Fri, 18 Jul 2008 19:30:49 GMT

The Light Ages

by Ian R. MacLeod

Consumed "Faithful Unto Death"

nobody@allconsuming.net (seiran) — Fri, 18 Jul 2008 19:30:01 GMT

Faithful Unto Death

by Caroline Graham

Nooooooo (rated 5 stars)

nobody@allconsuming.net (seiran) — Wed, 16 Jul 2008 11:54:29 GMT

A Tale of Two Sisters

by Ji-woon Kim

There is an American remake set for 2009, because god forbid America should let an amazing film stand on its own rather than be gutted and dumbed down/sexed up/culturally warped for mainstream audiences.

See this now, before it’s ruined!

Travis, why are you in a theatre? Give me a reason. (rated 1 star)

nobody@allconsuming.net (seiran) — Tue, 15 Jul 2008 00:26:42 GMT

Silent Hill: Origins

by Konami/Climax

This game makes me foam at the mouth with rage, for reasons summed up perfectly by Zero Punctuation.

I’m considering this + 5 to be the official death of the series.

Consumed "Silent Hill: Origins"

nobody@allconsuming.net (seiran) — Tue, 15 Jul 2008 00:26:42 GMT

Silent Hill: Origins

by Konami/Climax

NOT WORTH IT!

Consumed "Wall-E"

nobody@allconsuming.net (seiran) — Tue, 15 Jul 2008 00:20:57 GMT

Wall-E

WORTH IT!

Over ten years. Worth the wait.

nobody@allconsuming.net (seiran) — Tue, 15 Jul 2008 00:12:32 GMT

Wall-E

Pixar’s masterpiece. Period.

Not just an excellent animated movie or an excellent movie for your kids. An excellent movie. Period.

Consumed "Boogeyman 2"

nobody@allconsuming.net (seiran) — Tue, 15 Jul 2008 00:07:38 GMT

Boogeyman 2

by Jeff Betancourt

NOT WORTH IT!

Interactive Suicide Game (rated 1 star)

nobody@allconsuming.net (seiran) — Tue, 15 Jul 2008 00:07:38 GMT

Boogeyman 2

by Jeff Betancourt

I’m going to leave aside the terrible plot, characters, pacing, portrayal of various mental disorders, etc, and stick with the positive: The hidden game!

It’s like those Highlights pictures with the objects hidden in, only the picture is a mental hospital, and the objects are things that no mental hospital would ever, ever, ever have inside it because of the suicide risk: Flights of stairs, toxic cleaning liquids, sturdy cords, scissors, unlocked medicine cabinets, breakable glass, and MORE!

Find them all, and you win…nothing. There are no winners involved in the making or viewing of this movie. None.

Consumed "Boogeyman"

nobody@allconsuming.net (seiran) — Tue, 15 Jul 2008 00:00:08 GMT

Boogeyman

Also Warwick Davis in an ill-fitting owl costume. (rated 5 stars)

nobody@allconsuming.net (seiran) — Mon, 14 Jul 2008 23:57:32 GMT

The Chronicles of Narnia - The Silver Chair

by Alex Kirby

TOM BAKER = PUDDLEGLUM.

If you need any other incentive to see this, there is something seriously wrong with you.

Unoriginal but enjoyable.

nobody@allconsuming.net (seiran) — Sun, 06 Jul 2008 23:03:15 GMT

The Orphanage

by Juan Antonio Bayona

As far as characters and plot go, there’s nothing new in this film. The ending, in particular, is a pretty straight ripoff. And the story is a little muddled.

Regardless, I found myself liking this film. It’s low-key at the right moments and builds with proper tension in the others; the director knows how to turn a little into a lot. It’s gorgeous to look at, and has some pretty bold camera angles that reminded me of Dario Argento.

There are moments of this film that are genuinely frightening, and that’s more than about 90% of the horror out there now can claim.

Consumed "The Orphanage"

nobody@allconsuming.net (seiran) — Sun, 06 Jul 2008 23:03:15 GMT

The Orphanage

by Juan Antonio Bayona

WORTH IT!

Consumed "The Grave Tattoo"

nobody@allconsuming.net (seiran) — Wed, 02 Jul 2008 02:16:45 GMT

The Grave Tattoo

by Val McDermid

Consumed "Trompe le Monde"

nobody@allconsuming.net (seiran) — Mon, 30 Jun 2008 13:25:39 GMT

Trompe le Monde

by Pixies

WORTH IT!

Consumed "The Ragman's Memory (Joe Gunther Mysteries (Paperback))"

nobody@allconsuming.net (seiran) — Sat, 28 Jun 2008 02:12:34 GMT

The Ragman's Memory (Joe Gunther Mysteries (Paperback))

by Archer Mayor

NOT WORTH IT!

Consumed "White Tea with Blueberry & Pomegranate"

nobody@allconsuming.net (seiran) — Sat, 28 Jun 2008 01:47:50 GMT

White Tea with Blueberry & Pomegranate

by Lipton

WORTH IT!

This review comes with bonus hate. (rated 1 star)

nobody@allconsuming.net (seiran) — Tue, 24 Jun 2008 06:56:39 GMT

Sharp Objects: A Novel

by Gillian Flynn

The very first paragraph of this book was terrible. After one paragraph, I was waiting for the style to improve.

After the first page of this book, I was grinding my teeth over the clumsy style and waiting less patiently for it to improve.

Writing style didn’t improve.

If this was marketed as your basic mindless suspense novel, I could have forgiven mediocre-to-bad writing, because I would have been expecting it. But it got a fair number of good reviews, so I was expecting something more.

Bonus hate one:

About a third of the way through, both the terrible family secret and the identity of the killer were jaw-droppingly obvious. I went along a bit longer wondering if maybe they were just really obvious red herrings but no, no, you really do have to be reading the book upside-down and backwards not to guess its secrets. Which are not that shocking. Lifetime Movie grade stuff. Which is fitting, since the one-dimensional characters are all Lifetime Movie stock.

Bonus hate two:

This author is clearly very self-satisfied with her groundbreaking, daring look at female vulnerability.

Except that it’s not groundbreaking. Or daring. Or new or bold or interesting in any way.

High school girls are mean to each other? I had no idea! Teenage girls bury their emotional pain by cutting themselves, puking up their meals, or partying with sex and drugs? You don’t say! Deep down, not even the popular girls are really happy? Stop the presses!

See above: Lifetime. Grade. Stuff. It’s nothing short of embarassing to watch an author trot out this tired stuff with such a smug psuedo-feminist air.

If you’re considering this book, watch some LMN instead. You’ll get the exact same experience, but you’ll have commercial breaks you can use to regret your decision. And cry. And cut yourself.

Consumed "Sharp Objects: A Novel"

nobody@allconsuming.net (seiran) — Tue, 24 Jun 2008 06:56:39 GMT

Sharp Objects: A Novel

by Gillian Flynn

NOT WORTH IT!