A healthy majority of Americans (61%, according to Pew Research) say having close friends is essential to living a healthy and fulfilling life. However, more than half (53%) say they have fewer than four close friends, with only 38% reporting five or more.

The numbers don’t lie: Americans have become more isolated, and American society more fragmented, since the turn of the century. Loneliness is on the rise. It’s not much of an exaggeration to say that human connection is something of a lost art.

The silver lining here is that human connection is the sort of “lost art” that can be regained. Whether you consider yourself an introvert, an extrovert or something in between, here’s how to make that happen in your own life.

See Others As Human

It only makes sense that fostering human connection begins with seeing others as human. However, this is sometimes easier said than done. It can be tempting to get caught up in your own needs, and those of your immediate family, and choose to ignore others’.

People like David Miscavige, leader of the Scientology religion, follow a different path. Miscavige is renowned for making those with whom he comes into contact feel seen, no matter how briefly. This is one of the defining characteristics of his leadership — an important reason why members of the Scientology religion respect him so.

“During our brief interchange, he made me feel like I was the only person in the world and that it was the high point of his day to stop and congratulate me on my kid’s acting performance in a television commercial,” writes screenwriter John Evans, recalling a chance meeting during which Miscavige praised Evans’ son, a budding actor.

Those words of praise fromMiscavige meant everything to Evans and his kid. 

Get to Know Your Neighbors

By the same token, taking a little time to get to know your neighbors goes a long way toward building connection — and community.

Set the stage with basic, not-too-personal questions. If they respond well, continue the conversation. If they seem reserved, give them space and try again later, or let them reengage on their own terms. Either way, you won’t know unless you try.

Make Time for In-Person Socializing

The evidence is at this point irrefutable: Socializing is good for your body and mind.

“We are social animals by nature, so we tend to function better when we’re in a community and being around others,” says Dr. Craig Sawchuk, a psychologist with the Mayo Clinic.

Set aside one night a week, if you can spare it, for face time with friends or relatives. Once or twice a month, get together with a wider group of people to expand your social circle and experience social situations you might not otherwise.

Link Up With Other Like-Minded People (Or Budding Social Butterflies)

If you’re among the majority of Americans with a small social circle, look for others who are both in the same boat and looking to change that. Join an after-hours affinity group for people with shared hobbies or passions, or use a “friend dating” app to meet people in more intimate (but platonic) circumstances. This is a better-than-chance way to meet people who are actively seeking new friends.

Become a Pet Person

One exception to the “actively seeking” rule involves pet ownership, and specifically dog ownership. While minding their complicated etiquette (and posted rules), visiting a dog park with your “best friend” is an excellent way to meet human friends. Whether you bond over your shared affinity for a particular breed or some entirely unrelated interest, furry friends have a wonderful way of breaking the ice.

Be Willing to Set Boundaries

None of the foregoing should be construed as encouraging a “move fast and break things” approach to making friends. Quite the opposite. For your own sake and the sake of your current and future acquaintances, it’s important to set boundaries — lest you do too much and burn yourself out on socializing altogether. This is a lifelong journey, remember.

Loneliness Is a Choice

It might sound harsh to say that we affirmatively choose to be lonely, but this is very often the case. Retreating into our own bubbles, into what we know, can be comforting — until it’s not any longer.

If you feel that the time is right for you to make a change, you now have the tools to do so. For inspiration, you need only look to those in your life who’ve made the same choice before you. They understand the power of human connection, and they’ll be all too happy to help you discover it for yourself.